Maybe Not A Fetish Ball Kind of Girl, But There Were Highlights (Part Two)

I’ll do a list of highlights and a list of lowlights, fun stuff first:

1. Sweetie looked so cute all dressed up in a tie, suspenders, and a fedora—I definitely want to encourage her to be draggy more often.

2. I loved getting a chance to show off Sweetie’s rope art. It took a while to get me into the corset and harness, but I loved standing near the entranceway in my pretty tiara, sparkly black dress, leggings, and heels, with my arms up, her hands pulling and adjusting the rope this way and that, with my friend Switchpoet and lots of strangers watching nearby. She finished with a heart at the back of the harness, in pink and purple ropes as you’ve seen; I really am the Hello Kitty of rope bottoming.

3. Even though I was mostly a failure at it, it was fun to get to lead Switchpoet around on a leash. He was a really good sport about how ineffectual I was. When we first came up with the idea of me quasi-topping him, it kinda captured my imagination, but I just couldn’t make it convincing. Still, it was fun covering him in glitter and commanding him to go get drinks for me and Sweetie. It’s funny how I can be the bossiest person in everyday life, but I just drop the ball if I try to take a dominant role for fun…

4. Remember the couple I had a good date with, back when I was trying for unicorn practice? Painter and Ro-gan? They came to the ball and we got to catch up. They said they even would’ve set me on fire, had such a thing not been disallowed. They watched me play with Sweetie, which made an awesome thing more awesome. Painter was all dressed up as a doll, with big sproingy hair (She makes spring wigs herself!) and silver eyelashes. They took Ro-gan’s pants at the door because he wasn’t dressed kinky enough, so he had to walk around in just his Star Wars underwear, T-shirt, and Doctor Who scarf. I got to hear a little bit about their adventures at kink camp, but it was really too loud to talk.

4. Speaking of Dr. Who, while I didn’t get to realize my dream of getting tied up in a TARDIS, Sweetie and I did get to make out in one—what a nice place for aftercare! I didn’t mind the little dude in steampunk glasses who kept peering in the windows at us.

5. The kneeling bench we chose had shackles at the bottom of its front legs, so I couldn’t lift my head all the way up while Sweetie was spanking me. If I wanted to tell her something, I had to kind of just wait for her head to come down to me. (Did I mention it was really, really loud in there—couldn’t even hear myself getting spanked!) It made her feel unintentionally rougher than she really is, and that was exciting.

Plus, there was a beautiful suspension going on right next to me, the woman just looked so blissed out and happy as she got ropes tied to her middle, her ankles, her wrists-she looked so well cared for. She had these gorgeous long Amazon legs and pretty pinup heels. I always said I didn’t want to do suspension, but surprise, I do!

As an added bonus, tada!--Painter wants to learn suspension and says I can be her practice bunny. (Yes, I’m having a conversation with myself about calling myself a bunny. I think I’m okay with it…)

6. Added to my list of things to try: fire flogging. The guy doing it got shut down before I could try it, but not before it gave me an I-want-to-go-to-there.

But now for the bad stuff:

1. I hate the aspects of kink life that feel like high school. The girls at the door were mean to me. I was coming from another event so I just walked in in a regular pretty dress, and you should have seen the judgmental stares. They didn’t believe me that Switchpoet was right behind me getting my suitcase of goodies searched. I felt vindicated after I was dressed and roped up and the ticket-taker guy said “Okay, you win.” My rope-enhanced cleavage has that effect on people.

2. Maybe it was because the music made communication impossible, but there was something empty about the (crowded) ballroom. From the fashion show (With the cheesy announcer saying “If you think they’re hot, let them know...”) To the silvery alien girls in the same tutus and silver bustiers, to the fact that I couldn’t hear myself or my fellow players, I just felt disconnected from myself, from Sweetie, from the room. The spiritual aspect of things was missing. It really helps me to appreciate the intimacy and authenticity I’ve felt before at smaller parties.

But heck, I got to dress up, get spanked, and make out in a TARDIS, so I’d call it a win, even if it wasn’t the most edifying one.

Unicorn Practice FTW: A Good Date Is a Good Date

Week before last, I was feeling antsy and wondering where my next adventure would come from. So I posted an ad on a couple of FetLife lists asking for suggestions, mentors, co-conspirators, etc.

On of the best responses came from Ro-gan (I don’t know what his name means, but that’s what he wants to be called) who offered the help of himself and his fiancée, whom I’ll call Painter. He had me at “if nothing else, maybe we can get together for game night.” They live a little ways away, so we agreed to meet in a restaurant somewhere in the middle.

It was a pretty, tropical-themed place, the kind of nice restaurant my in-laws might choose. Watching for them my thoughts were the same as waiting for one person: would they think I was too fat? What if they didn’t like me? It was less nerve-wracking than waiting for one person, though, for whatever reason.

The fears didn’t last very long. Painter later told me that when she first saw me, I reminded her of one of her old friends. They really did remind me of so many of the nerdy-cute couples Sweetie and I are friends with. She’s a pretty blond dressed in a soft grey long sweater and a pretty, silvery scarf. He’s wearing a T-shirt with a drawing of C3PO and R2D2. While we waited for our table, she scrolled through her pictures, showing me their new Jack Russell terrier and her daughters, who were off at a Girl Scout dance with their dad. Ro-gan told me about his ironic job-security at the unemployment office. Painter paints faces, mostly at comic conventions and kids’ birthday parties, and is also studying to become a nurse.

We sat down at our table and I got to hear all about the kink camp they love attending. Ro-gan “helps run some of the kidnappings” there. When he told me that, I couldn’t stop laughing with delight, I don’t know why. I guess it’s just that people are SO CREATIVE at getting their needs met, and I like the team spirit of it.

(Just as an aside though: maybe it because I just watched The Hunger Games and have been having Capitol-themed dreams, but how decadent of a society are we if we can afford to hire ourselves kidnappers. Sometimes it hits me just how much of a luxury this project is.)

Anyway, he helps run the kidnappings and she has always wanted to try erotic body painting. I immediately volunteer to be painted. He says “Only if I can watch.” He says this a lot. And I’m like “Of course!” They aren’t polyamorous, more just looking to share people together and as friends.

It’s impossible to overstate the adorableness of these two. I wanted to call them Muppet Girl and Comic boy, but those names wouldn’t work so well if I end up in compromising positions with them. Ever so, no matter what they were saying, they just radiated such muppety fun. She cheerfully explained that his small penis makes him perfect for anal and he nodded along agreeably, (Not on my list, but hey, good for you!) he threatened to tie me up and make me watch all of the Paranormal Activity movies, and still, my overall impression was “Awww...”

My favorite is the look of inspiration she got when we were brainstorming scenes. Her whole face would light up as she’d say “I know! I’m in the bathtub! And you’re washing me but I’m still the top because you’re, like, my lady-in-waiting or something! And then it gets all hot and heavy!” (He: “Only if I get to watch.”) I couldn’t help but get inspired along with her.

There’s something that happens in my heart when those kinds of conversations are happening. Something unlatches and it’s like I feel untethered, similar to the feeling of flying in a dream. Sex-creativity is really the best thing ever.

We talked for hours, until I realized it was getting late and I should get home to sweetie. Driving back, I felt giddy and happy and just a little more myself.