A Bad Review, a Glimmer of Faith, Part One

 

On my Feeld profile, it says I’m looking for “Boyfriend Material and/or Good Boys to tie up.” I’m wondering if I should get rid of the latter part, dispense with the “and/or” and let go of the hope that any more meaningful “Ma’am” experiences are coming my way. I feel demoralized and SO tired of dating—I’m wondering if the apps are maybe too harsh for me, if I even know what people mean when they say “connection.” Some of this is just..winter, but some of it is last week’s adventure with Entitled Guy.

He started out with a sweet curiosity that reminded me of 2022’s Good Boy—plus he’s a little older, 33 to TGB’s 27, that seemed good! He started out as kind and thoughtful. We talked about books! He’s really into brain books! So am I!

I don’t usually sext before I meet someone in person, but I was feeling cozy and adventurous last Tuesday night so I asked if he would like to tell me what he would do if he was over. Tuesday is one of my loooong workdays, so I microdose THC when I get home. I was open and wet and tired and game.

He wrote back! With voice memos! In a sweet, careful voice, he told me very respectfully (Maybe even a little too respectfully) all the things he would like to do to me. It was meticulous and detail-oriented—I was impressed that he could just TALK OUT such lovely smut! His story made me so swoony that I couldn’t find words! I told him that and he sent! More voice memos! With more kindly details, gently working his way to a more explicit but still very respectful story.

He asked if we could Facetime, and I said that I didn’t want to, but he could send me a video if he’d like. Sometimes guys think you’re a catfish if you don’t Facetime-on-demand, so I made him a cute video with angles I liked, just me saying hi in my pajamas, nothing naked yet.

He sent me a video I LOVED, playing with his gorgeous dick, but also sent a text pushing for Facetime again.

“On FT you would get my face AND my toy.”

(Is this really a selling point? The face part, yes, but did I need to see his Fleshlight or whatever?)

When he tried to push past my first Facetime no, I should have cut off the conversation, but instead, I typed back, “I really don’t want to Facetime, but your dick is so beautiful!”

And I made him a playing-with-boobs video that I liked a lot. I felt like I was being so generous and fun! He was calling me “Ma’am” over text and seemed to be having a LOVELY time!

When we were done, I sent a voice memo praising him for making me feel